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[personal profile] stonebender
As per [personal profile] klwalton's request I'll write a little about people I have met online .

I started doing online stuff way back in the BBS and FidoNet era. At that time I hung out on Sci-Fido, a science-fiction related FidoNet node. I mostly conversed with folk I already knew from science-fiction conventions. To be honest, even now, I have real trouble delineating individuals that I've met online from each other. At least until I met them face-to-face or they somehow become individuals in my head. I'm getting a bit better around this, but it's still a struggle. When I finally got on the Internet for the first time I discovered newsgroups pretty rapidly and lurked on several, Alt.poly being one of the first that became a "must read" newsgroup. It was the first time I encountered the word polyamory. I had been in what I called an open relationship for years before having any other term for it.

I started keeping track of some regular posters. The only ones I remember clearly are Stef ([personal profile] firecat) and Aahz mostly because they posted far more than anyone else. Eventually, I met them both. I can't remember when exactly. I do know that I volunteered to help host their poly without drama or PolyWOD’s in the East Bay. Mostly because I wanted to attend and I knew my house was accessible.

I met [profile] gconner, [personal profile] rmjwelll, [personal profile] dawnd, [personal profile] akienm, Loren, Casey, Maggie, [personal profile] the_ogre, (I'm sure I'm missing folk here) all through the SF-Bay poly list. All except [profile] gconner, I've met in person.

I also met my first lover outside of Carol through the SF Bay poly list, [personal profile] daltong. She noticed my posts on SF Bay poly and had followed the link to my homepage in my .sig and wrote me a pretty "foreword" e-mail which turned into an approximately six-month affair. It never really got to the relationship stage although I still love her and probably always will. It's pretty clear to me that the main reason I'm poly identified is that I have yet to fall out of love with anyone I've fallen in love with, even though in at least one case, (and I'm not referring to [personal profile] daltong) it would be better if I could.

Most of the other people that I know through meeting online are folk that I have met through [personal profile] serenejournal or I've known from alt.poly and appeared on livejournal. My relationship with [personal profile] serenejournal began remarkably like my relationship with [personal profile] daltong. It appears that I need a really big clue by 4 to notice anyone’s interest in me and I am much too shy to profess any interest without clear and ever present signals. We knew each other casually on alt.poly. I have to accept this is true even though I don't really remember. [personal profile] serenejournal has the documentation. E-mail progressed to online chatting which led to phone calls and then our first meeting in January 2003. So, in some very real ways the people that I have met online have dramatically changed my life for the good.
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December 2020

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