(no subject)

[stonebender]

As won't be a surprise to anyone who reads this journal, I get depressed. I don't think I'm depressed now, but I'm having a hard time figuring out my life these days. Contacting people is an effort. I don't have much confidence in my communication skills or perceiving things realistically. I'm pretty sure am reacting badly to things that have absolutely nothing to do with me. I want to quit doing just about everything I have committed to do. If I could, I'd get in a car and drive. Not that I want to leave anybody. I love my partners and I mostly like my life. I would like an adventure though. When I feel like this I think of going to Belize. Eating crawfish ettouffe in New Orleans or seeing the Louvre. Drinking a pint in a Dublin neighborhood pub. Watching a Shakespeare play at the reconstructed Globe Theater. Having sex with a woman I don't know.

Comments

[stonebender.livejournal.com]

I love you. We used to call that "running away to join the circus," too, but nowadays we talk about Vermont.

Vermont? I haven't heard that.

I know what it's like to want to escape. Last week and the week before were like that for me. I think that I tend to do what you do (acknowledge it, think a lot about it, try not to be upset with myself about it), but I think it dissipates faster for me. And, of course, I have more ability to up and drive off if I want, so there's that. (Just musing, don't mind me.)

I love you too and I'm sorry for any part I had in you wanting to head for Vermont. I think I try to do the things you say. I'm not completely sure I do a very good job.

I hope it gets better. Hope you have sex with a woman you don't know. ;-)

Of all the things I'd like to do that is probably the least likely, but I appreciate the thought my love.